Break, Change, Rebuild
by blahblahblah97
Summary: 'They're both a kaleidoscope of colours but they have each other because He's Clint And she's Natasha And they're partners, so where one goes The other follows.' The aftermath of the Battle of New York and Loki's mind control. He got under their skin more than they thought, and break, change, rebuild takes on a whole new meaning.


**AN: Hey guys! So I was clearing out my room and came across this in a notebook, and I just filled it out some more! All the 'break, change, rebuild' bits are new, the rest are from whenever I wrote this! Obviously after the events of The Avengers, this is supposed to be the aftermath for our fav master assassins. I'm missing the Clintasha action, not gonna lie. Can't wait to get ma boos back on screen in Age of Ultron. I hope you guys like it and…..I don't know! Let me know what you think, have an amazing day!**

**Songs-Didn't have a playlist, was just listening to some tunes, but I'd recommend 'Don't Let Me Go' by RAIGN, 'Human' by Christina Perri and 'Save Me From The Fire' by Barrett Strong. ^.^**

I'm watching myself

Drifting away

A vision so darkened

I cannot stay

I'm reaching out wide

Trying to catch myself before I fall

Too little too late

Can you save me?

-**Don't let me go by RAIGN.**

Clint Barton wasn't scared of anything.

He had faced many a foe, earthly and extra-terrestrial.

He wasn't scared of anything.

But Clint Barton was terrified of Natasha Romanoff.

Not of her, exactly, even though he probably should be. But he never was, and that's probably why Fury sent him to take her out all those years ago, when he made a different call. She was truly terrifying, a menace, who would make even the strongest man beg for his life.

Yet Clint had never been scared of her like that.

He'd stared down the barrel of her gun enough times and didn't feel fear.

He was scared of what he could do to her. What she could do to him. What they could do to each other. How they could change.

Break. Change. Rebuild.

That was always S.H.E.I.L.D.'s way of doing things.

Break your opponent. Take them out as a threat. Break as many bones as you have to to quieten them, to get them to disengage.

He and Natasha did break each other.

He broke through the Black Widow, and accessed Natasha, the girl who had been hidden for many years.

She broke through the straight laced soldier, because S.H.E.I.L.D. had conditioned him to just follow orders as The Red Room had done to her.

Change.

Change them. Their views. Use them as a spy on the inside.

He changed her. Told her that there was another path, offered her something no one else had. Changed her side. Changed her view. He'd say she changed herself, but Natasha had always believed that it was Clint all along.

Rebuild.

She rebuilt a life for herself. Made something of herself. When people heard her name they no longer ran in fear, they looked at her in awe, they respected her. The fear was still there, but it was the fear that came along with being notorious. And it wasn't just Natasha, it was Clint too. As soon as they were made partners-which was effective immediately, as soon as she was cleared for field duty, Natasha was 'his mess', after all- that notoriety grew, as Hawkeye and Black Widow were S.H.E.I.L.D.'s top agents, got the biggest missions, and always had each other's backs.

Clint had always been grey.

He wasn't good or evil, he wasn't normal or superhuman, and he wasn't one thing or another. He was simply in the middle. But then he was being mind controlled by Loki, and he was blue, so blue.

He was blue and Nat had always been so

Red

Red

Red

And he was in there, stuck in the blue, stuck in his head, knowing what he was doing but he couldn't stop it, so all he could do what scream, and hope she inflicted as much damage to him as he knew she could because he deserved it.

All he could do was scream, because that's Nat, your partner, your best friend,

And you need to

STOP

And you can't kill her

Because you love her

And she won't kill you, because she's

Red

Red

Red

With her auburn strands, crimson lips and blood on her hands and red in her leger.

She won't kill you because she feels like she owes you (and you think she's a little in love with you too, not that she'd breathe a word about that. Love is for children, after all) so where do we

Go from here?

But she finds a way around it because she's Nat

(Damn your girl is smart)

And then he's back to grey, but there are still streaks of blue

But that's okay

Because while Tasha is red she used to be so black

And Loki turned her colours for a while too.

They're both a kaliedscope of colours but they have each other because

He's Clint

And she's Natasha

And they're partners, so where one goes

The other follows.

Break. Change. Rebuild.

Break.

That's what Natasha thinks Clint is going to do to her. Loki picked on a fear long ago planted by Clint himself, over a few beers at his lake house, when he half-jokingly, half thoughtfully said 'maybe the only person who can destroy me is you and me you.' She thinks he's going to break her, be the death of her, and be her demise. She always pushed through it because it's _Clint,_ he'd never hurt you.

But there are more ways to break someone than by bones, aren't there?

Change.

She had to change him back, get him back to Clint, because this isn't him and he'd hate it.

She knows he'd hate it.

So she has to take him down, and if that means killing him, so be it. But by God if he doesn't take a piece of her with him.

He'd hate it. He'd hate this. He wouldn't want to be this.

She repeats this to herself through every blow, every deflection and block.

Natasha wants to go back into emotionless Black Widow for this, because this _hurts,_ more than his punches do, because it's Clint who should be laughing and joking with her, not trying to kill her.

She throws the thought away, knowing that Clint deserves better than being another death at the hand of the Black Widow.

But she figures it out, because at this rate she'll try anything if it means she doesn't have to kill him, and that one word

'Natasha?'

Was like music to her ears.

Rebuild.

Now he's the one with red in his ledger, only his is all tinged with blue. He hates himself, for what he did to all those people, his fellow agents, Natasha. So he took out as many aliens as he could because he's part of the reason they got here in the first place.

It's tentative, what they have, their friendship is fragile because she's scared he'll break her, Loki's words echoing in her mind

'_Not until I make him kill you. Slowly, intimately, in every way he knows you fear.'_

Because Clint really was right, the only people that could break either Clint or Natasha was the other person.

It's tentative, because he's so ashamed of what he's done, the changes that were made to him, that sometimes he doesn't believe it when Nat tells him it wasn't his fault, it wasn't him. He's ashamed of what he did to her, how he hurt her.

But they break, change and rebuild, because while they're the only ones that can break each other, they're the only ones that can rebuild each other too.


End file.
